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We
Want To Help You Succeed As A Happy Single Person
(c)
Harlan Jacobsen
Many newly divorced and widowed
came to our classes on Divorce Recovery, Dating Again,
and Happy Single-ization over the past ten years saying
that this was the absolute worst time of their lives.
Others that attended had been single for months or years
and, as a single person, still felt like a fish out of water.
Six months later, most of these
same people, when asked, said they were now doing great.
That it was the best, most enthusiastic, zestful time of
their life.
Many of them were still coming to
the classes primarily because, they said, they wanted to
help others by sharing their experience. To help these folks
turn their new life, as a single person, around.
They became: Volunteer
single life coaches.
When you graduate, you too can help
in our chat room support groups and online bulletin boards,
no matter where you live. Share your new life as a
single person by helping others. It will help remind
you of where you have been and where you are now.
We would like to tell
the new people, that the
worse the disaster and the adjustment you have to make,
the better the chances you have for a great future.
Here is why. When your house goes
through a minor storm, you just patch it up and go on exactly
as before. In contrast when your house is completely
destroyed, you often rebuild completely different.
You build the new replacement house to be exactly the way
you always wanted. Or, you move to a new area and
a totally different house that is just what you always wanted.
The disaster seemed
like the end of the world
when it happened and yet it winds up putting you in a far
better place.
Can you see in this example how single
people who go through the biggest disaster make the biggest
changes for the better? So if you were damaged little, you
will likely change little.
We noticed in the classes that of
the many couples that had a mediocre relationship for years,
one person was little affected by the split, but the other
was wiped out emotionally. That person, as a result,
came to the classes and made a lot of changes. Two years
later, those people were now doing terrific. They
were looking back at their former spouses who had hardly
been affected by the divorce, who were as usual, still bumbling
along with one problem after another. Their spouse had grown
little or none as a person over that time.
Conclusion: Good news,
the more devastating the death of your relationship was,
the more likely you will be motivated to make the changes
to put you in a good place 6 months from now.
These single people were the exact same
people that 6 months before were at a low point in their
life. They were still newly divorced or separated
and the death of that relationship looked like the worst
thing that ever happened to them. It was the hardest
to handle and get through. Now when asked about that
same divorce, they would say it was the best thing that
ever happened to them.
< font size="3">How could that
be? Did the divorce change
or their ex-spouse change? No, they personally changed
and made it the turning point to begin a great new life
that they now control.
We can not do it for you. We
only point out what has worked very well for others. You
can make the same mistakes most others have made and get
hung up on trying to find your way.....to the good life....
or you can just skip those detours and go directly to what
works.
We will tell you what others
have discovered that really works.............
*New articles and additional
parts of serial series are posted on the web and appear
in our Singles Monthly Newspapers.
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